...I am a terrible Mom. No really. After all the stories, the warnings and the signs that it could happen...Owen rolled off the bed. I feel awful. I'm such an idiot. Just yesterday I left the room briefly and came right back in to find him in the process of rolling near the edge. I rushed in and got him before anything happened. So why, I ask myself, did I not heed the warning signs? I thought I was safe today because he was in the middle of the bed. I thought I was safe because I was all of five feet away from him. I thought I was safe because it usually takes him some effort to roll from his tummy to his back and surely I'd hear that. But no. Not safe. Instead I heard a thump and found my sweet little boy laying flat on his face on the floor. And instead of the giggles I heard when we played on the bed, I heard terrible cries of sadness and pain. Cries that broke my heart. So it's official. I am a horrible Mom.
Miles said I need to realize that I'm going to make mistakes as a parent and forgive myself. I know that's true, but I hate to think that it's because of my actions that Owen experienced pain. I hope I can avoid these kinds of mistakes in the future and be a better Mom.
And just so you know, I'm not posting this for sympathy or to hear that I'm not a bad Mom. I'm posting it so I never forget the day that I realized I can never be too safe when it comes to watching out and caring for my baby.