11 months

Owen is now 11 months old! I can't believe that in just one month he will be a year old. It's amazing how fast time goes by.

Owen has made a lot of changes this month and is becoming much more mobile. In the beginning of the month he started pulling himself up into a standing position and would often cry because he didn't know what to do. Now he is constantly pulling himself up, but is still not quite cruising around the furniture yet.

Standing has made putting him to bed interesting, however, because he will stand up and cry and doesn't know how to get back down and settle himself to sleep. So the sleep training we did previously seems to have gone out the window for the time being, as we have to go in to his room, comfort him and lay him back on his tummy. Hopefully this won't last for long.

At the beginning of the month, Owen was a saint and was sleeping in until some time between 7 and 9 am. It was amazing. That only lasted about a week. But just like everything else, I figure he'll phase in and out of different sleep habits.
He has also learned how to climb. He climbs up onto the dishwasher door when it is open, into cupboards, over mounds on the floor, etc.
Owen loves to empty bags, boxes or containers and refill them. He also likes to put his pacifier into empty containers. He also loves to hold his extra pacifiers and will rotate them from his mouth to his hands and back and forth. This has helped to keep him entertained while changing his diaper (something he does not enjoy).He has started to share his cheerios and food with me. It's really cute when he attempts to feed me.

He likes to drag things around with him when he's crawling throughout the house. For a while there he got pretty attached to this tiny plastic bowl we had and would crawl everywhere while holding it in one of his hands.

He popped out his front two teeth within a week of each other. We had some unenjoyable teething time for a while there, but he did alright.

He loves to follow the vacuum around and will chase me throughout the house as I vacuum.

Owen loves other kids and babies and enjoys having play dates with them.
He's super silly and has started taking his cheerios, lifting his hands high in the air, and dropping them. This eventually morphed into him placing them on top of his head. We love our silly, fun, little boy. He has such a darling personality and we really enjoy the time we have with him.

March Madness

I love this time of year, when March Madness is upon us. Let's be honest. I'm not a huge sports nut. I mean, I LOVE playing sports, but I don't really care that much about watching them. I'm happy to watch a game...baseball, basketball, football, whatever...but I don't make an effort to do it. If someone else is watching, I'll join in. In all reality, my sports-watching days have been numbered since being married to Miles. He doesn't care about sports, so we don't watch them. So why, you might be asking yourself, would I care about March Madness? Because it's bracket time!

Every year for at least the past 10 years (I can't remember how long this has been going on) my Dad likes to do some friendly "betting" with my siblings and me. He always has us fill out a bracket and then pays us for correct guessing. Actually, there's really no betting involved. Mostly we just get to guess and get paid if we're right! Pretty awesome, huh? In years past, he would pay us a certain amount for each round (ie; 10 cents for each correct guess in the first round, 25 cents for the second round, 50 cents for the third round and so on...increasing to 100 dollars for the championship round). In the past few years he's changed the game. Now, we have to pick a winner from the beginning. Then we wait until the sweet sixteen and pick winners from there to the end. For the championship game you can stay with your same winner or cut your loses and pick a different team. You get more money if you guessed right from the beginning than from the sweet sixteen. The only caveat is that we have to beat my Dad and do better than he did with his bracket.

This year was especially fun with BYU being in the mix, and actually having a shot at making it past the first round. I picked them to beat Florida, mostly out of loyalty. I didn't really think they would, but thought I should stay true to them. To their credit, it was a smokin' hot, close game going into overtime. Sadly, they lost their steam and Florida won by 9. But the Cougs had a good run and it was fun to see them have such a great season.

We'll see how the rest of my bracket plays out. I originally picked Ohio State to win, but cut my loses and picked Kansas from the sweet sixteen. Either way, I'm on track to beat my Dad since both his picks (Duke and Pittsburgh) are out. But it's not about the money (even though that's nice). It's just a fun way to stay connected with my Dad who has been a sports nut his whole life and devoted so many hours to being involved in all of his kids' teams and sporting events. It's pretty awesome...and I know you're jealous. ;)

Morbid Thoughts

(Demotivators)

I don't know why, but I often do "worst case scenarios" in my head. And not in the good way...you know, the way where you're driving on the freeway and you think, "What would I do if someone started spinning out of control in front of me? How would I react?" Those thoughts are helpful and make you prepared for different situations. No. That's not what I do. My worst case scenarios are just the kind that make you fret, and worry and feel awful.

When I was married to my first husband, I used to worry all the time that something would happen to him. That he would die somehow and I would lose him. Little did I know that I really needed to worry about him leaving me. I think this transformed my fears in my marriage with Miles to worrying that he would leave me as well. He's done a pretty good job of reasurring me that he's in it for the long haul, so I don't worry about that too much anymore.

Now, having Owen in my life, my irrational fears have transitioned to him. I always check on him every night before I go to bed to make sure he's ok, covered up good, that his pacifier hasn't dropped on the floor, and that he's not cramed in some uncomfortable sleeping position (even though Miles tells me not to move him and assures me that he probably likes sleeping as he is). Each night I go in, I also check to make sure he's breathing. Sometimes I have to put my hand lightly on his back or tummy to feel his diaphragm moving. I think that's pretty normal. A lot of first-time Mom's like to make sure their baby is breathing...especially in the beginning when there are concerns of SIDS. But my fears extend farther. I often worry about him falling or drowning or choking or any number of things. I wonder, what would I do? How would I react? How would I go on living? Would I blame myself? Would I ever be able to recover? I don't like it. It's useless, fruitless, worries and thoughts that do no good.

And then there are real people out there who have had to deal with the loss of a child. Like my dear friend's cousin, Molly Jackson, who out of her grief started A Good Grief to help others who are struggling to cope with their losses. And maybe it's stories like that, while inspiring, strike fear in my heart of what it would be like to lose my son.

After my brother died, it was apparent that my Mom was in constant emotional pain and saddness. She talked about losing a child and what that felt like to her. Having Owen in my life and feeling overwhelming love for him gives me a glimps of what that must feel like. And I ache for her.

I don't know why I let myself go to those dark places in my mind. Maybe it's because I yearned for a baby for so long and now the thought of ever losing him is just too much. I have a friend who says he doesn't worry about things like this because he figures that if someone dies, it was their time to go. I wish I could have that straight-forward, simplistic view without allowing emotions to get in the way. But it's those emotions that allow me to love and feel so deeply. I guess all I can do is just enjoy each day that I am blessed to be surrounded by my loved ones and cherish them always. I can let go of pettiness and differences, fears and worries, and focus on the positive and good, and continue to live and love...and look for that silver lining. ;)

Blessed

Last week, Miles was encouraged by a couple of his friends to apply for a job at their company, where he had applied last year. Last time he applied, they declined giving him a position because one of the four men who interviewed him did not like him for whatever reason. Miles found out that same person was being demoted and would no longer be involved in the interview process. What was more, the other three who had interviewed him previously were very interested in him applying again and spoke positively about hiring him. We were excited about the prospect because it could mean a decent increase in salary, improved benefits, and Miles could work with his friends again.

Everything happened very fast. He sent in his updated resume, spoke with their HR person, and went in for an interview in a matter of a week. The same day he interviewed (last Friday), they offered him a position paying almost 50% more than what he is currently making! Miles was definitely feeling torn because his current place of employment (Opinionology) was about to give him a promotion as well as send him to the Philippines for two weeks to do a training. Not to mention, everything he has been working on over the past year is about to roll out the end of this month. We figured there was no way that they would be able to match or even come close to the offer.

...But we were wrong. His boss was surprised to say the least, but went to bat for Miles and came back with an offer that, including the year-end bonus, is actually better. We were totally shocked and very happy. We decided that him staying at his current job is what is best for Miles and our family in the long run. He is being promoted to Manager of Mobile Development and still gets to take his trip to the Philippines. He won't have to commute and is still working just minutes from our home. It really is wonderful, and we are feeling so blessed. It came at a great time too when we are planning for baby number two in the upcoming future. It will really help us to save for that, as well as put aside money for a home. We are so so excited, and overwhelmed with this blessing in our lives. I'm not sure what we did to deserve it, but we are ever so grateful, especially in this difficult economy.

4-Hour Body

Miles bought a book near the first of the year called The 4-Hour Body. It's by Tim Ferriss who also wrote The 4-Hour Work Week. Miles read through it and said that I should read it and we should start the slow-carb diet he describes in the book. I read through the parts that pertained to the diet. I liked a lot of his philosophies on losing weight, dieting, and health. He comes from a very scientific standpoint and it just seems to make sense. So we decided to start a couple weeks ago. Let me just say, I am struggling. It focuses on eating a lot of protein, legumes and vegetables. It's really not so bad and I feel like I would often eat similar meals. The hard part, however, is the things you have to avoid (bread, milk, cheese, pasta, rice, flour, potatoes, fruit, and sweets). I often find myself craving carbs. Sometimes sweets, but mostly things like a bowl of cereal or a piece of bread. I told Miles I'm not sure I can keep up with it. I'm getting bored of eating the same things over and over. We've tried to "spice" things up a bit by making garlic mashed faux-tatoes (mashed garbonzo beans) and rice-aflower (a rice substitute made out of cauliflower). But eating eggs every morning and chicken for dinner every night is just getting old. I think Miles wants to stick with it. He's already lost 10 lbs. (I'm down 5 lbs.) So I'll support him by eating what he eats for dinner, but I think I'll take my bowl of cereal and pb&j for lunch. :P Yes...I'm a pansy and couldn't hack it.