Tuesday, July 12, 2016

Back from the Dead

I was searching through my old blog posts for a picture from years ago. As I quickly scanned through, I stopped briefly on a few posts and was amazed at how few details I could remember from different events or blog posts. Many of them were seemingly small moments in time. Unimportant. Trivial. Yet at the same time, they were memories and thoughts that I would never recall otherwise. I've had thoughts of guilt that I haven't kept up with my blogging. Guilt over the expectations I had for myself as a parent to record my children's lives. I started out strong with Owen, continued some with Elsie and have failed miserably with Hazel. Yet it's not the guilt that is bringing me back. It's the feeling of finality. Of our feeble, temporal, imperfect minds that cannot hold everything in. The big events, I hope I will always remember. But it's those day to day moments - the seemingly mundane - that are the collection of your life, that will easily be forgotten if they aren't recorded. So I'm reviving this blog and coming back from the dead. I'm planning on starting from today. If I get a moment to go back and want to, I may. But I can't allow the unwritten past to overwhelm me from today. Hopefully my shiny new computer will motivate me as well. Nothing better than blogging from bed, right? ;)

My preeeeeeciouuuussssss.....

Saturday, August 15, 2015


I have been incredibly pampered over the last week and a half. The first pampering happened last week when Miles and I went car shopping (for what felt like the 100th time...although it was a lot less). We went to a Honda dealership (the third one in about a week) in Salt Lake and talked to them for hours about purchasing a minivan. Long story short...we walked away with this beautiful 2015, smokey topaz, Honda Odyssey. I never imagined I would buy new. But after all the searching we did, we discovered that they really do retain their value well and don't depreciate much over the coarse of 1-5 years. Plus, the dealerships are offering some large discounts on new cars, likely to get the 2015s out of their stock and prepare for the 2016s. Anyway...I don't feel too badly about it. I imagine we will have this for quite a while and make it worth our while.

As much as I rag on minivans, I'm actually pretty darn excited about it. It has so many cool "bells and whistles" that will make my life ridiculously easier. Automatic sliding doors (openable by pulling the handle, pressing a button on the key fob, or pushing a button from the driver's seat), automatic hatch, keyless entry and engine start, a camera for blind spot check on the right side, easy access to the back row (Owen can easily move the seats, which is awesome), blue tooth calling capabilities, a mini "fridge" in the console, leather seats (easier to clean), and on and on. In case you can't tell, I might be in love. So, a big thank you to my husband for "buying" his wife not one, not two, but THREE children AND a hot new ride to accommodate all these little rug rats.

The next pampering happened a few days later when my friend, Kelly, put together a little "pampering party" on my behalf. I didn't want any gifts at all (let's be honest...this baby girl will have everything and more with the many hand-me-downs from Elsie), but she insisted on allowing people to bring a gift to "pamper" me. We met up at Bake 360 in Draper. They sell delicious pastries, but now that I've had food from their newly opened cafe, I might be even more in love with their savory offerings! (For the record, I ordered the Croque Madam and it did not disappoint!)

These lovely ladies from my ward/neighborhood brought me some very thoughtful and sweet gifts.

Left to right: Me, Ronnie Hurless, Lindsay Adams, Jen Ard, Melissa Owens, Kelly Dyches (with baby Elise), and Natalie Dobbin.

Unfortunately, not everyone could come. So this is just a fraction of the amazing women I am surrounded by. Sometimes Miles talks about moving. I think he has that itch in him since he moved a lot as a youth. But when I think of these women and how incredible they are, I can't bring myself to even consider it. They are my village.

Tuesday, August 11, 2015

Numero Tres: 37 weeks

I almost killed myself this last week. Ok, I'm being dramatic. I took the kids to the Herriman Reservoir for a play date with my friend, Desiree and her twin girls. The kids had some large cylindrical water shooters. Owen apparently was swimming with his and didn't bring it all the way back to the shore. As he was sitting on my lap, we look out and see it drifting "out to sea." I sighed and said, "Well, I better go get it before it gets further away." Des asked if I was ok to do that. I said, "Yeah. Sure." She said, "I'm just not a confident swimmer." I said, "Oh yeah, I was on a swim team. No biggie," and headed out into the water.

About 10-20 breaststrokes out into the water I realized I had severely underestimated my abilities to breathe. Swimming skill? Check. Buoyancy? Check. Oxygen intake? System failure. I flipped to my back to give myself a break. I started to freak out a little when I realized I was not catching my breath and was still panting fairly hard. My only saving grace was that there were some paramedics in motor boats doing some trainings or something and I figured if I was going down, they were only out about 100 yards or so. I did think to myself, "What are you doing? This dumb $5 squirt gun is not worth this." But I was close, so I reached out to grab it, flipped back to my back and did a slow kick most of the way back to shore. I was dizzy and nauseated when I got back. Yeah...not my smartest move. Gratefully, Des was also ready to do some screaming for the paramedics should I go under. :) I'm realizing that my body is telling me I am less capable than my mind believes.

I might as well include some cute pictures of the kids the day I almost died. ;)

Elsie made me a "birthday cake," sang Happy Birthday to me, and had me blow out the candles. It was adorable.

This week at the doctor's office was fairly uneventful. I remain at a 1 cm dilated and about 80% effacement. I honestly don't every expect anything. I think I'd be totally surprised if it were any different. But I also don't put a lot of stock in that. With both of my kids, my water has  broken early (8 days with Owen and 10 with Elsie) and I was still at 1 cm by the time I got to the hospital hours later. So...meh. I did find out that I am negative for Group B strep. I'm really happy about that. Now I won't feel the need to rush to the hospital and get hooked up to an IV first thing after I arrive. Yay! I am having a lot more Braxton hicks contractions these days. Nothing major, but I hope it's a sign of things to come...sooner rather than later. ;)

Monday, August 03, 2015

Numero Tres: 36 weeks

The week leading up to this appointment was rough. I only got in one actual workout, but was happy to pass on the rest of the week. Although, in all fairness, I was very busy all week playing with my sister, Kim, and nephew, Austin, while they were in town. I also feel like six hours of walking, standing and climbing at the Museum of Natural Curiosity, and a fun-packed day at Seven Peaks count as some form of exercise. ;) But that's neither here nor there. What I DO know, is that last week kicked my butt and I was feeling it. I've been feeling pretty good during this pregnancy. Capable, strong, fairly energetic, etc. But the end has hit me...HARD. I feel slow, sluggish, big, tired, sore, and a myriad of pains I'd rather not feel.

I'm also sleeping rather horribly. I toss and turn (as well as a woman with a very large, pregnant belly can do) all night. I think my bad sleep affects Miles' sleep and in turn, his bad sleep affects mine. It's a pretty vicious cycle and ain't nobody happy about it. A couple nights ago, I woke up and had to make one of my many trips to the bathroom. I was facing away from the outside of the bed. I went to turn over and get up, but having almost zero core strength, it was far more difficult than I anticipated and I groaned loudly and said, "Oh gosh!" I sheepishly thought that I had probably woken Miles and I can't even get out of bed without it being a big to-do. The next night I woke with a hideous charlie horse in my calf. I get them a lot, but I usually just quickly flex my foot and it goes away. This time it did NOT help one bit. My leg seized up and I sat up (far faster than I thought I was capable) moaning and saying, "Ow! Ow! Ow!" Miles was kind to ask if I was ok and rubbed my back. It eventually went away, but once again...sleep ruined. Not to mention, in the morning my calf was sore for about half the day from all the spasming. I'll say this...even for someone who has a relatively "easy" and "comfortable" and even "enjoyable" pregnancy...it is still filled with its own set of difficulties.

I told my doctor about some sharp pains in my right hip and also the occasional debilitating pains in my groin area where my leg and body attach. Answer: Round ligament pain. Woot. Baby is growing and there's lots of extra pressure as well as the relaxin being produced and preparing my body for labor. The good news about all of this is that I am getting closer. It's funny because when I was 35 weeks, I felt like I was still a long ways away. But for some reason 36 has felt a LOT closer. The end is finally in sight.

This was my first cervical check too. Nothing exciting. I think she said something about being 70% effaced and maybe dilated to 1cm. I forgot how totally enjoyable those checks are. (Sarcasm.) When she was checking to see if baby girl was head down I thought I might actually go into labor. Sheesh. Oh, and she couldn't say 100% that she was head down. Although with all the hiccups I feel low, I'm guessing yes. Oh, and she also did the Group B Strep test. I'm praying it comes back negative. I was positive with Elsie and it was such a pain to have to deal with the antibiotics while in labor. I guess I'll wait until I get the results to worry about it.

Monday, June 22, 2015

Numero Tres: 30 weeks

Nothing super exciting this round. I did ask Dr. Savage about some pain I get when I push on the upper right side of my abdomen. I also feel it when the baby is there and I push against her, or if I get a nice elbow from Owen or Elsie when they're sitting on my lap. She said that it is probably some torn stomach muscles that are tender. Unfortunately, since my belly will just keep growing and stretching, it won't go away. I just chalk it up to one more lovely side effect of pregnancy. I'm grateful it doesn't bother me all the time. Truly, this pregnancy has been FAR better than my last.

That being said, the heat has started to pick up here in Utah. I would feel totally ungrateful if I didn't first say how totally and completely blessed we have been with a LONG spring, a lot of rain, and mild weather. It has been beautiful. In all honesty, I haven't taken it for granted. Every single time we have another 70-80 degree day I say prayers of thanks. But I knew it would catch up to us eventually. And here it is. High 80's creeping to the 90s with sights of 100 up ahead. NOOOOOO!!! So all I've wanted to do is lounge around and be extra comfy. So here I am...in a muumuu. It doesn't get much more comfortable or light and airy than that!

Monday, June 01, 2015

Numero Tres: 27 weeks

The week of the glucose test! Eek! Ok, it's not really that bad, but it's not great either. Prior to my appointment, I asked if I could bring the drink home with me so I wouldn't have to sit around the doctor's office for an hour. They said it was fine so long as I arrived a little early.

Here I am, downing my drink in my car:
It's really not all that bad. Although I tried to drink it quickly and the big gulps kind of burned my throat a little. Gratefully, I didn't feel as nauseated after finishing it this time.

I told my doctor I've been having some trouble with insomnia. I've been trying not to nap during the day to make sure I'm tired at night, but I still seem to struggle falling asleep and staying asleep. There have been times when I wake up in the middle of the night and for the life of me, cannot fall back asleep for an hour or two. Dr. Savage said I can take unisom nightly. If this continues, I may need to! I try to only take half a pill though because it can make me feel a little groggy in the morning. However, I do have to mention that my wonderful children are on a pretty awesome schedule right now. It seems like as soon as summer hit, they started sleeping later. I know part of that is later bed times, but that hasn't always helped in the past. I often don't hear a peep until at least 7:30 and sometimes as late as 8:30 or 9AM in the morning. It's amazing.

I also asked the doctor about some sciatic pain in my right hip and back side. I usually only feel it when I'm laying on my back. She said there's not a lot you can do and just suggested not laying in a way that causes the pain. Looks like I'll have to start side sleeping from now on. :(

And lastly, I've been dealing with some acid reflux at night. She said to take Prevacid or Prilosec in the morning before I eat. I feel like a lot of this is a repeat from my last pregnancy. I kind of knew the answers to these questions, but also forgot. So here it is for memory's sake. ;)

Also, I've been trying to stay somewhat consistent in working out. It's not always daily, but I try to exercise a minimum of 3x per week. I decided to document my post workout sweat. Obviously I really "enjoyed" it.

Tuesday, May 05, 2015

Numero Tres: 23 weeks

We went to Florida for a family vacation last week, so I pushed my appointment off by one week.

I was fairly anxious to see Dr. Savage this week because I was having some serious itching going on with my face. In previous pregnancies, I was fairly itchy too, but it mostly stuck to my legs and then general itchiness of my back and belly. This time, I was doing some serious clawing at my legs and face. And my face seemed to be developing some kind of rash. She told me to try taking Claritin in the morning and Benadryl at night. She said I should use Cortisone cream sparingly on my face. I also mentioned I was getting restless legs and charlie horses. She said to make sure to get enough calcium, eat a banana every day and drink plenty of water.

So off I went with plans to do as the doctor ordered. Well, the itching in my face did NOT stop. The antihistamines didn't seem to touch it, and it was just getting worse. I was waking up frequently at night clawing at my face. I started to do some research and read about a few conditions that can happen in pregnancy that might possibly be the cause. After taking part in some online discussions with other women, I decided to request a blood test to confirm one way or the other. I called my office and said I was concerned about cholestasis and asked if they would order a blood test. She went ahead and ordered it. Sadly (and happily) it came back negative. I was grateful because it sounded unpleasant and could cause still birth late in pregnancy. But I was also devastated to not have an answer. The nurse suggested I go to a dermatologist. These are pictures of what my face looked like after a night of clawing:

I called to schedule with the dermatologist and they said she didn't have any openings for at least 3 or 4 weeks. There was no way I was waiting that long. I put myself on a waiting list and went ahead and scheduled with their APRN. A couple days later I went in. The APRN said she thought it was sun reaction or allergy. However, she was very interested in the fact that it didn't affect my eyes and was specifically around my face. As I was leaving, she stopped the doctor who I had attempted to see in the hallway and showed her my skin. She started asking me all these questions and then just brought me into a room instead. It was kind of awesome because I wasn't able to schedule with her, but ended up seeing her anyway, and for a much longer time than I spent with the APRN! She asked about all my skin care products. It was hard to narrow it down to something that would have solely affected my face. She took some pictures, gave me her email address and said she would be happy to let me know about any products and their ingredients if I emailed them to her later. She told me to stop using most (if not all) of my lotions and face makeup and I bought a (very expensive) cream that she created for my face. The APRN had said I would see a noticeable difference within a few days. I felt as though the itching decreased, but the redness was still there.

I emailed the doctor and told her I didn't see much of a difference in the color to my face. She said it could take up to three weeks for the redness to go away. Boo! After all that time, I do think it decreased a fair amount, and the itching has gone away completely. I tend to think it may have been the powder/coverup I was using on my face. I eventually felt safe enough to wear eye makeup again and that has been fine. However, I've stayed away from anything on my face and that seems to have been a good idea as I haven't had any problems since then. I still feel like there's a little residual redness that I may follow up on later.

As for the belly...it has started to pop a bit. These are pictures I took at 20 weeks (HALF WAY!). I can still just barely see my feet. :)